The Truth

Tossing and turning, I couldn't fall asleep. I've been up for awhile now and I knew it was way past my bedtime. Mommy said that I had to be in bed by 9:00, but I always stayed up a little longer. I was still fidgeting in bed, so I finally opened my eyes and turned my head. My clock said it was 10:28pm. "Great," I thought to myself. I should have been sleeping almost an hour and a half ago. I was exhausted, but I still couldn't get out of my head what my friend asked me a while ago. I suddenly got the strength to get up and I looked around. I turned the other way and saw my sister talking on the phone, as usual. I could hear her talking, because she was talking so loud. Typical Paige was talking about boys. I think boys have cooties and they're mean. But whenever I try telling Paige that, she yells at me for ease- dropping, so she says. I can't help that she is always talking on the phone. I shared a room with my fourteen-year-old sister but since my sister was older than me, she had more privilege than me. We had two twin- sized beds and they were both on the opposite sides of the room. "Paige, I can't go to sleep," I said. "Ugh, again? Phoebe, what's been up lately? This is the fifth time this week. Why don't you just get a glass of milk and then try to go back to sleep," she replied. "I don't know, but continue on with your conversation. I'll be back," I responded. I quickly got up, grabbed a jacket, put on my fuzzy slippers and opened my room door.
Outside, I saw my brother's door open, so I peeked in to see what he was doing. My brother is a year younger than Paige, so he was thirteen. He was really into music and he was an average football player. Standing in the frame of his door, I asked," Peyton, what are you doing?" He couldn't hear me because he had earphones in his ears and was on his laptop. So I walked up to him and looked over his shoulder. He abruptly took off his earphones and starred at me. "What are you doing?" he asked. "I was just seeing what you are doing brother. Am I not allowed to?" I responded. He looked at me with such anger and I knew he didn't want me to be in there, so I held my head high and swiftly left his room. Ugh, boys these days, so mean to their younger sister. I was the youngest of five children. I had three older brothers and one sister. Two of my brothers were out of college and they live on their own, but I live at home.
As I walk down the long hallway, I turn to my right where my mommy's room was. I glanced in, but not too far in so that she couldn't see me. She was lying down on her bed and reading her book. I knew that she couldn't see me, because my mommy is near-sighted. I think that's a funny word, but she said it meant when you can't see things far away. I thought it was silly, because wouldn't you be far- sighted if you couldn't see far? But what would I know; I'm only a six-year-old kid. I had the urge to talk to my mother about what has been on my mind, ask her about it, but I just couldn't. So I just went downstairs and got a glass of milk, as my sister said. I opened the refrigerator door and got the milk. Then, I opened the cabinet to get a glass and I poured a little bit of milk in the glass and warmed it up. I thought it tasted yummy and I even sneaked a cookie, but don't tell, I'm not allowed to have sweets after dinner. After I cleaned up, I went back upstairs, but I had to ask my mom.
I took my time walking up the stairs and impulsively stood in front of my mom's door. "Knock knock knock." My mom took off her glasses and told me to come on in. "How come you're not in bed yet young lady," said my mother. "I just couldn't go to sleep mom. What are you doing?" I replied hoping not to get into too much trouble. "I'm just finishing up my book that I'm supposed to read and prepare a lesson for tomorrow. You know that I'm busy with my students and I have to be done with this soon," said my mother calmly. She looked like she was going to fall asleep, but she's been looking like that a lot lately. My mother works four jobs, she is a nurse practitioner, she is a teacher at a big school, and she's a registered nurse and is going to be a doctor. I haven't seen my mom around that much, and since she is so busy, she isn't able to take me to school or pick me up. My aunty who lives really far away comes to take me to school and makes sure that I do all my homework. I rushed to my mom's bed and plopped my body on it. I then sat up and moved around a bit, just to make sure I was cozy before I started talking.
"Mommy can I ask you something," I said with hesitation. "Of course baby, you know you can ask me anything. Now what is it," responded my mother. "Um, mom, where is my dad? Do I even have a daddy?" I asked. My mother's face dropped. She looked as if she was speechless and she couldn't even move. "Phoebe hunnie where did that come from" answered my mother with delay. "The other day at school, we were talking about Father's Day because it is coming up this month. Our teacher, Mrs. Jill, said that is was a very important day and that for everyone's dad; we were going to make a special card. Then, we went around the room and told everyone what our dad's name was. I thought to myself, what is my dad's name? I looked at my friend Kelsey and asked her what her dad's name was. She said it was Chad, and I thought to myself, how she knew. I raised my hand and asked Mrs. Jill, what a dad was. Everyone started to laugh at me and I didn't understand why. Mrs. Jill told me that a dad is a male parent of a child. I thought that every child was only supposed to have only one parent, but I guess not. So mommy, where is my daddy? What is his name?" I said. I knew it was all too much for my mom to answer. Where to start? She was looking down at her hands and looked up at me. She looked as if she was ready to speak, but she stopped, nothing coming from her mouth. I just sat there patiently waiting to hear what she was going to say.
“Baby, I was going to tell you when you were older, when you were going to be able to understand,” said mother. Her eyes watered up and a single tear fell from her face. From then on, I knew it was bad, real bad. She continued on, “You do have a father, his name was Francis and he was such a good dad. He was in a car accident coming home but you were only six weeks old so you don’t remember anything. Your brothers and sister remember a little bit because they were older but you were just a little baby. He was coming from work and he was falling asleep on the wheel, because he didn't get enough sleep. It was an accident and he drove into a tree. He passed away that night in the hospital baby.” Her voice was breaking every time she said a word. I knew it was hard for her but for me, I couldn’t take it. Tears were rushing down my face as if it was raining, creating a big waterfall. I wanted to know more about my father, what he looked like, where he was from, everything. We were both silent, listening to our own sighs and whimpers. “Did you love him?” I questioned my mother. “With all my heart and soul Phoebe. You know you look like him right? You have his eyes, his nose, and his beautiful smile. You remind me so much of him,” mother said with a big smile on her face. “Can I see a picture of him please?” I asked quickly. She got out of bed and opened her dresser and took out a big album. It was beautiful, pages full of him. He was so handsome, exactly how I pictured him. He was tall, dark and took goofy pictures. Just seeing him brought tears of joy to me, knowing that I had a dad, and I knew who he was. “Are you okay mommy?” I asked while grabbing her hand to hold. “Of course hunnie, I’m fine. I’m glad that I told you, but just know that your father loved you so much. He said that you were the cutest baby that he’s ever seen and that he wants the best for you. You were the first child that he actually cried all night for and he was so happy to see you when you were first born.” A smile couldn’t leave my face, while my mother was talking, I was happier than you could ever imagine. I had a dad, a real dad, who loved me dearly. I missed him so much, even though I didn’t even know much about him and I loved him, more than you could ever imagine. I looked at the clock with astonishment to see how late it was. I then got up off of my mother’s bed, kissed her goodnight, and went to my room. Paige was already sleeping, while her friend was still on the phone because I could hear her talking still. I turned off my light and got snug into bed. Knowing that I had a dad, even if he isn't with us right now, made me the happiest kid ever (: